I am a Gray Jedi

What does it mean to be a Jedi?  Well it doesn’t mean what you see in the movies.  It doesn’t mean I can move things with my mind or make people do things they don’t want to do with mind tricks.
Is there some belief that there is a mystical power that guides us, encourages us in matters of right or wrong, surrounds us and even though we can not see it, we can feel its presence?  No, that’s what the rest of the world calls God.
I have studied most major religions in the world and have come to the conclusion that they are all basically the same.  The same Gods known by different names based on different religions.  In all major religions there are different sects, breaking off into smaller parts because they believe slightly different than everyone else, so too is it with Jedi.
In every major religion you have those that are calm about their beliefs and you have those who are extreme, believing that all should believe as they do or face death; the light and the dark.  But there is a third, one who can walk on both sides and not be harmed, in the Jedi Order they are called Gray.
In the beginning of every religion, all are Gray, living in balance of the positive and negative emotions that live within us all.  Somewhere along the way there was a split, diving people into extremist, even Jedi.
The light side believes they are not extremist but when you believe in an all or nothing concept of life then that is an extremist.  The dark side believes in the same concept, just on the opposite end from the light and in separating themselves from the rest have chosen to give themselves a different name, Sith.  Despite what you call one another, Jedi, Sith, or Gray, it is still the same belief, just like in any other religion.
The Jedi Code:  There is no Emotion, there is Peace.  There is no Ignorance, there is Knowledge.  There is no Passion, there is Serenity.  There is no Chaos, there is Harmony.  There is no Death, there is the Force.
The Sith Code:  Peace is a lie, there is only passion.  Through passion, I gain strength.  Through strength, I gain power.  Through power, I gain victory.  Through victory, my chains are broken.  The Force shall free me.
Can you see the extremism?  No this, only that.  Doesn’t give you a choice really.  This is why I chose to be a Gray Jedi.
The Gray Code:  There must be both dark and light.  I will do what I must to keep the balance, as the balance is what holds all life.  There is no good without evil, but evil must not be allowed to flourish.  There is passion, yet peace; serenity, yet emotion; chaos, yet order.  I am a wielder of the flame; a champion of balance.  I am a guardian of life.  I am a Gray Jedi.
I have always felt I was something more than what Christianity said I was.  I have always felt there is something more to our universe than what the Bible, Quran, or Shruti have to offer.  I have always felt that my soul belonged to another time period, I have always felt I was Samurai.
Return of the Jedi was the first Star Wars movie I seen and I knew I wanted to be a Jedi.  I was told the Jedi were bad because the Force was really magic and as a kid that was crushing to me.  As I grew up I still wanted to be a Jedi, I believed in their philosophy more than any other religion.
The Jedi Religion was first discussed in 2001, but it was tainted with people trying to do the things in the movies.  When it became an official religion in 2011, I too laughed but was glad at the same time.  I was no longer the only one who wanted to be a true Jedi.
I, however, still lived with fear in saying I am a Jedi while being surrounded by Christians.  I know the Bible, I studied for a long time, but I still wanted to be a Jedi.  Still, I lived in fear and that fear was beginning to take over, and I knew that was wrong.  A Jedi should not have to hide.
I am a Jedi of the Gray Order, and I will no longer live in fear of telling anyone.  I will be laughed at and poked fun of, but that will be no different than any other time growing up as a Jehovah’s Witness.