I have a confession to make. I killed two people. To explain what happened I have to go back to
the beginning of summer. I was outside
mowing the grass. Living next to the
woods I know there are all sorts of insects I have to watch out for. Well, one of those little suckers got the
best of me and bit me on my lower back, close to my spine.
After five days I needed to go to the hospital,
the pain was unbearable. After some mini
drama, caused by the pain, I was admitted to the hospital. Within the hour blood was drawn, not just a
single vial or two, no, I’m talking a lot, like half a pint.
Over the next day it was decided that I needed
surgery. It took a total of three days
before I went under the knife and in that time frame more blood was taken, and
by more, I mean another pint total. I made
a few jokes about all the test they were running, needing all that blood.
Maybe you can tell me exactly what bit me? Laughter… No.
Maybe you can tell me what kind of infection I
had? Laughter… They are just going to
treat it like staph, just to be safe.
Maybe you’re trying to clone me? Silence.
Maybe you’re trying to figure out how to implant a
mind control device during surgery so the government can use me as a
patsy? Silence.
I had my surgery and was released the next
day. I’ve never been knocked out like
that before or woken up in that manner. The
next day I was sent home to recover.
Over the next five days I felt helpless. I couldn’t do anything for myself. I was waiting for a release to return to work
but I was told I could only get that release if I went back to the hospital to
see the doctor who did the surgery.
When I called to get my appointment time all hell
broke loose. Heated words were shouted,
tears fell from being overwhelmed, and I was told the doctor wasn’t ready to
see me so I could go to my own doctor to get my release.
Over the next three weeks I was healing up faster
than anyone thought I could. My doctor
even said I shouldn’t be healing that fast.
I took this as a good thing, after all I’ve always been a fast
healer. The following day I received a
phone call that made me question my own healing.
The hospital called and said I needed to come in
right away to discuss something that was discovered in my blood. Remembering the last conversation and the
price they said I would have to pay to see the doctor in the hospital I told
them to kiss my ass before hanging up.
The phone rang again and I was told there would be
no cost for the visit. In fact, if I
came in right away my entire hospital bill would be dismissed. My stomach dropped and I thought I was going
to faint. If they wanted me to come in
so badly that my entire bill would be dismissed it must be serious. They offered
to pick me up but I was already driving so I headed toward the hospital.
When I got to the hospital I headed up to the
fourth floor. As I stepped off the
elevator the hairs on the back of my neck stood up. There was complete silence on the floor. I walked around the corner from the elevator
and couldn’t believe my eyes.
Standing at the desk staring back at me in
disbelief was a very sexy handsome devil.
To his right was that same good looking hunk. I wondered why a doctor would have fun house
mirrors in the lobby.
Then I thought the mirrors must be broken because
the reflection was distorted. Finally it
dawn on me that those were no mirrors because we were all wearing different
clothes. This could only mean one thing.
CLONES!
Fear took over and I wobbled as fast as I could
back to the elevator. My cane started to
unscrew itself from the fast motion of my hopping while trying to remain
balanced. As I got to the elevator I pushed
the button in a panic, over and over again, thinking my hard pressing would
recall the elevator faster. The door,
after what felt like an hour, finally opened and there was another dashingly handsome
face staring back at me.
Trying to prevent my escape the clone lunged
toward me. I raised my cane to block him
from grabbing me and as I did it finally opened. I pulled the sword out of the cane and instinct
took over. I pushed the clone away from
me and thrust my blade forward.
I could feel the cold steel pushing through the
soft fatty flesh that was my body, right through to the heart. At the moment the other clones caught up and
stopped suddenly, all of stunned by what just happened. They watched helplessly as life faded away out
of my eyes. I was literally watching myself
die.
As the clone slumped to the floor lifeless, it
also slid off of my sword. The thump of
his body woke us all from our trance. The
other two clones grabbed my arms and tried to pull me back away from the
elevator. I started kicking wildly,
connecting with Two’s groin. He
instantly let go of me and fell to the floor.
With my arm free I swung it around to pull away
from One. Taking advantage of my new
found freedom I swung as hard as I could with my cane, hitting one in the head
with the metal base of the cane. He fell
down, unconscious.
Turning back toward the elevator, Two was in my
way, on his knees, but regaining his breath and attempting to stand. In a panic I swung the sword with all my
strength from left to right, cutting his throat open. Blood spewed out and I jumped back, unable to
dodge the red spray.
The doors began to close and I made a dash to get
into the elevator. I pushed the button
for the garage and the elevator finally began to move. I looked over at my body lying there, trying
to figure out what just happened. As the
doors opened I wobbled to my truck as fast as I could and drove away like a bat
out of hell.
Now I’m looking over my shoulder everywhere I
go. Somewhere out there is at least one
more me. I’ve been expecting the cops to
arrest me but even that has its complications.
After, what will I be charged with… murder or suicide?