Sleep Paralysis

Sleep paralysis is defined as a temporary inability to move or speak while falling asleep or upon waking up, most often occurring in people who have narcolepsy or sleep apnea.  This, however, is not the truth.  The truth is you are being examined by a being far more powerful than humans.

There are many beings that come to us.  A ghost, a demon, a guardian spirit, an alien, a shadow being.  Most of the time you do not even know they are there, but as they depart you will know.

People often feel something heavy sitting on their chest, holding them down.  Nothing is sitting on you, but you are being held in an invisible shield to keep you from doing physical harm to yourself.  Your mind, however, is not so lucky.

Without any warning, your body falls asleep deeply and quickly.  Next the being, whomever they may be, comes in and stands over you.  Your body is covered in the shield and the roller coaster in your mind begins.

You run from nightmare to nightmare, never being able to wake up.  Nothing makes sense.  Everything looks as if you are in a fun house, distorted and out of focus.  You try to speak but some language you’ve never heard comes out.  Your heart rate increases with each attempt to escape this horrific state of mind but nothing will work.  You can not move, you are asleep, and your mind is being viewed by this being standing over you.

When it finally ends, you are able to wake.  Sometimes your mind is so exhausted that you remain in a temporary coma, unable to wake for a few hours as your mind and body recover.  Other times you wake up before the shield is completely dissolved, leaving you unable to move as your invader looks into your eyes, smiling, before disappearing, causing your heart to race one last time as your body is freed.

Why do these being do this?  That’s an answer we may never know but that evil smile they always give, that knowing look that they just invaded our mind, violated our sanity, and there is nothing we can do to stop them is all the answer I need.  They are evil!  They wish to torment us!  To show us the power they hold over us.

How do I know?  A being visited me yesterday morning.

As I laid down to watch a movie within seconds I was passed out.  Nightmare after nightmare, I was being chased by monsters, reptilians, and I was totally defenseless.  No matter what I did, no matter what I thought, I could not escape.  My weak heart began beating faster as I went from one nightmare to the next.

I could not move, I could not scream for help, I could not be woken up.  I was a prisoner in my own mind and I was at the mercy of this merciless evil being.  Another part of the torment I received was being allowed to open my eyes while still in my shield, completely aware of my surrounds.  I could see everything around me, including not one but a total of three beings.

They stood next to where I laid.  One was at my head, his long boney fingers hovering over my face, as an invisible force held my eyelids open.  Another was next to my hips, feeding the shield that was keeping me from moving.  The third was at my feet, piercing red eyes burning into my forced open eyes, digging deep into my mind, unable to locate my soul.

Fear began to grow as my heart began beating so hard I could no longer breathe, my chest felt as if it was going to explode.  The being at my feet smiled one last time before waving the other two away.  They turned their backs to me and disappeared into the wall.

The remaining being glided over to come face to face with me.  I could feel its hot foul smelling breath, the shadow of its sharp teeth showing through the evil grin.  A boney talon finger reached out and touched my forehead, projecting a single word into my brain, “Return.”

He faded into nothing, releasing me from my shield.  I sat up quickly, my heart still racing.  I quickly ran to the restroom, turning on the light, looking franticly for the two that disappeared into the wall.  They were all gone and I had a sudden urge to pee.

It was as if I had just flushed out whatever invisible injection I was given to put me to sleep so quickly.  I felt nauseated and even though I did not want to, I found myself laying back in my bed, falling fast asleep once more, my paralysis gone.

I Am a Soul Collector

Time is said to heal all wounds, however, for a soul collector, such as myself, this is simply not true.

I am an Angel, of that there is no doubt, but what kind of Angel, good or evil, has yet to be determined.

Ever since I left the womb that kept me protected, I was born into conflict, and my soul has been a battlefield.

Soft and silent is how most of my life has been spent.  As any true monster lives, so as not to attraction attention to myself, I lived in fear of being destroyed, often times by my own hand.  The evil inside laid dormant, waiting in the shadows for the light to flicker out.

And flicker out it would, allowing the beast within to emerge, even if only for a brief moment before being lit once more.  It was me in my truest purest form, torn.

As I roam this realm, waiting, longing for my light to be extinguished permanently, I am looking for broken tortured souls to collect.  These souls are easy to collect for souls may be ours but they can be given to another.

True, a soul may be stolen but it can be stolen back, often times violently, destroying the soul completely.  In order to collect a soul for all eternity, it must be given freely, willingly.  Those who possess broken souls will often give them away willingly, so that they may be healed.

The truth is that their soul never stops being tormented.  It will suffer until Death releases it.  As an evil Angel, I feed off of their pain, however, they can be taught to live with the pain, reducing the sting daily.

Once the soul has been taught how to live with the pain a decision must be made, to release it or keep it for all eternity.  No longer having a soul of my own, keeping another’s soul holds no appeal for me.  I will freely return the soul to it’s owner.

However, sometimes a soul can not heal properly, and the pain they feel flairs up from time to time, allowing me to feed off of that pain.  For this reason there are only a few selected souls that I choose to keep.

Be mindful of your soul for the battle for your soul continues, deep within my own.